Confession: I have never had a banana split.
Yes, I’m a fully-fledged adult, a chocoholic and dessert fanatic, yet I’ve never eaten that classic ice cream dish. I came up with three potential explanations why…
Reason #1: I hated my foods mixing as a kid. Like I described here, I turned up my nose at anything Neapolitan: milkshakes, popsicles, and especially ice cream. So why would I try a dessert that purposely combined scoops of chocolate, vanilla, and strawberry… All on top of a banana? (Adding a fourth flavor = even worse!)
Reason #2: My mom convinced us early on that produce was healthy, and we earned dessert by eating more fruits and vegetables. If she allowed us to try a banana split, our crazy childhood brains might believe that it was healthy too. (It contained fruit, so why not?) Then we’d start sneaking ice cream for breakfast along with our bananas, and we’d toss all of Mom’s dessert definitions straight out the window.
Reason #3: I take too long! I’m the slowest eater known to mankind—most people wipe their mouths and lick their lips before I’ve swallowed five bites of dinner—and I dote even longer on desserts. I spend more time chasing melted drips down the side of my kiddie-sized cones than I do licking the original scoop of ice cream! So there’s no way I could finish three scoops before they melted into a big mess on top of the quickly browning banana. You might as well hand me a straw instead of a spoon!
Because my last excuse is the most believable, I both downsized my banana split into something a little smaller AND made it impossible for the dessert to melt. Now that’s my idea of the perfect summer sweet treat!